Although the new year is now officially underway, let’s face it: our diets don’t start until Monday. So even though we’ve all vowed to “eat right and exercise” this year (some of us, for the 27th year in a row, but, by golly, this year will be different) we may just find ourselves eating out a restaurant one last time tonight or tomorrow. Or both.
Around the end of last September, I presented some Eating Out Tips. I think it’s high time for another round of tips, but this time keeping in mind the current situation:
- If you’re used to ordering a diet soda, don’t. Not this weekend. If your server asks if you’d like some wine or beer say, “Yes, I would like some wine or beer.” In fact, forget the “or”. Get them to mix you up a wine and beer smoothie. With extra daiquiri mix.
- If your server asks you if you’d like a salad, forget that too. Do not waste your last night out on leaves. Just tell them to put the ranch dressing in your smoothie and you’ll be fine.
- I highly recommend getting a large serving of vegetables. If you’re unsure what kind are the best to get, always order by color. Golden brown? Yes. Green? No way. (Frings, for the win.)
- If for whatever reason you’re feeling guilty about large portion sizes, ask your server if you can order off the Kids’ Menu. You’ll be amazed how good you can feel ordering six or seven of the chicken finger baskets.
- Bonus points awarded for finding an All You Can Eat buffet. (Double points, if it’s spelled, “All U Can Eat.”)
- When the dessert cart is rolled around, ask your server if you can take a ride on it. Hey, you only live once.
Have a great weekend, everybody. I’ll see you all in group therapy right here first thing Monday morning.
on January 2, 2009 at 6:40 am
I might add: “What, no bread basket?!” if there is none. Or – “Hey, can we get a refill!” as soon as you’ve single-handedly emptied the one they bring.
*snort*
on January 2, 2009 at 7:19 am
A guy after my own heart!
on January 2, 2009 at 7:29 am
Love # 6!
on January 2, 2009 at 8:13 am
I totally felt that way the other night!!
Thanks for the laugh 🙂
on January 2, 2009 at 8:27 am
Fried green beans and the onion blossom count as veggie servings, right?
Have your readers jump to my blog today – its my monthly giveaway!
Happy Friday Charlie!
on January 2, 2009 at 10:26 am
Thanks for alleviating my guilt about not starting back on my diet yesterday. (I thought I was the only slacker…)
on January 2, 2009 at 10:29 am
Oh this totally made me laugh, thanks!
on January 2, 2009 at 2:03 pm
Fried Green tomatos.. is a veggie right? :-:-) great post..
on January 2, 2009 at 2:37 pm
Think I’ll go get a KFC. With corn on cob and coleslaw sides. No fries. That’s gotta be healthy! 😀
Tusc 😉
on January 2, 2009 at 6:41 pm
Haha, love the tips. I’m going out to dinner right now and planned on only eating half…you may have convinced me otherwise.
on January 2, 2009 at 6:51 pm
Onion rings always work for a night out even if it’s a Chinese, Italian, German or whatever type of restaurant, if they don’t have them stop at your favorite fast food place to pick some up. As long as you’re in that drive thru lane (you wouldn’t think about leaving the car), don’t forget a triple shake just for the ride.
on January 2, 2009 at 7:26 pm
Well I wish I had seen these tips yesterday before I decided to start behaving myself today!
on January 2, 2009 at 7:45 pm
Love it! Thanks for all the tips.
on January 3, 2009 at 8:04 pm
I would also recommend strongly that you double park in a handicap spot nearest to the door, to avoid unnecessary calorie expenditure.