The FullBar

There are about 3,400 Sonic Drive-In restaurants from “coast to coast,” as their web site declares. I’m not sure how they’re distributed between the left and right oceans—and even then I’m not sure exactly where the commercials are seen. So you may or may not recognize Molly Erdman.

She stars alongside Brian Huskey as the convincing husband and wife team selling Sonic products. He’s “not quite there” and she’s been called the “snarky” one. Whether those labels fit or not, one thing’s for sure: the commercials are brilliant. I can’t really put their routine into words, so I recommend watching this one or this one just to get you up to speed. You won’t be disappointed.

So what’s this got to do with “No Help Here” on the diet guy blog? Well, I’ll tell you. I stumbled across Molly’s own blog earlier this year and I got a kick out of seeing what the “Sonic wife” was up to in real life. On October 30, she wrote about a product she saw (on a distinctly non-Sonic commercial) called the FullBar. In her words, the commercial featured “a man who is most certainly a doctor because he is wearing scrubs [explaining] that the FullBar imitates the effect of gastric bypass surgery. […] When you have bypass surgery, all you have is the top part [of your stomach to fill], so you feel full faster. So…why not find away to get that full feeling without surgery? Could it be possible?”

It could, though admittedly she expressed the expected disbelief in the product (as do most people when confronted with yet another weight loss miracle). She wrapped up the post with:

This is basically a modern version of the tip that’s been in holiday issues of women’s magazines since the 1950’s: “Eat a snack at home before going to a Christmas party so that you can publicly look like a dainty flower who merely grazes on celery.”

I commented with, “Thanks for the tip on the FullBar though. I might have to make my own blog post out of that.” I really didn’t mean it one way or another, but a couple weeks later I was contacted by a FullBar marketing firm representative. “I came across your comment on Molly Erdman’s blog and checked-out your site. I know you are skeptical of FullBar, and I understand why, as it seems like another weight-loss trick. […] Your blog is both funny and informative, and if you are interested, we would love to send you a sample of FullBar so you can give it a try for yourself.”

I opted in. The bars arrived and I picked them up just after the New York trip. I opened the box and found four inside. I read the instructions. “Take one FullBar with eight ounces of water thirty minutes before a meal.” They recommend this for your two big meals a day. Hmmm… well, I guess I’m only in possession of two day’s worth of fullness. Not sure if I’ll have statistically significant results, but we’ll give it a shot.

The bars came in the following denominations: two Cranberry Almond, one Cocoa Chip, and one Peanut Butter Crunch:

I decided to have one a day to spread them out over a longer period. My strategy was to eat one of the Cranberry Almost bars first (since I had two of those) and then save the Peanut Butter for the last. (Because, of course, peanut butter is the greatest element in the periodic table. Don’t let anyone tell you Pb stands for lead.) Since the bars resided with me at work, I decided to apply them to my midday meal.

But this is where it occurred to me I might not be the best fit for the FullBar plan. I’m a software developer by day, and my so-called lunch hour starts anywhere from 10:30 am and might go all the way to 4:30 pm. Dinner might be at 5 pm or it might be at midnight. I do not eat regular meals. Guessing when I’m thirty minutes ahead of a meal is a real trick.

The next thing that occurred to me: I (almost always) bring my own meals to work or (very rarely) eat out somewhere. In both cases, I’m already looking at a fixed amount of food. It’s not as if I bring a shipping crate of sandwiches to work and just don’t know when to stop shoveling them down my lunch hole. I get my limited food out, begin eating, and in three minutes it’s over and I’m right back to work. So my hope wasn’t so much in portion control during the feeding, but in fending off hunger afterward.

I opened my first bar. Product enlarged to show texture:

In my head, bars like this are always of the granola type. So when I bit into it I was very surprised at the texture. If I had to equate it to anything, it was not unlike eating Super Sugar Smacks pressed into a rectangle, but with less Smack. Or perhaps it was more like a sweet rice cake. It was definitely not as heavy as it looked. The taste was good. (I’m always worried about tongue-raking food experiences.)

John walked in and said, “What is that? Are you eating a Fubar?” I glanced at the package. “Yeah, it does kind of look like that.” Sean asked, “So someone you don’t know just sent you those? Isn’t that like taking candy from strangers?” Yes. Yes it is. But we all know that’s the best kind.

Did it work? Let’s look at it in three stages.

Stage 1: Right After Eating. Lunch was over in minutes and there was no more food. I may not have felt hungry, because I didn’t immediately purchase a bag of chips from Vend-O-Land.

Stage 2: Later That Day. As I look over my Daily Plate entries for last week, it doesn’t look like I snacked in the afternoons. This could be for several reasons:

1. I just didn’t. (Yes, it’s been known to happen before.)
2. I was enjoying a placebo effect from the bar.
3. Or maybe it really worked.

Stage 3: End of the Week. When I look at the big picture, I notice two things. First, let’s look at the big picture. Here’s a graph for September 1 through today:

Thing #1: If you remember, I was starting to feel like I’d plateaued a bit right around Halloween, then vowed to just “maintain” through the holidays. And I did for a while.

Thing #2: But look at last week. I posted a three pound loss. Even Christie noted, “Is it just me or are you losing more weight since you resigned to just maintain? Maybe I should try this…”

Did the FullBars work a miracle on me? In short, no. Our entire feeding cycle is far too complicated to be able to single out just one variable like this. Psychologically, I had Thanksgiving behind me and was already feeling pretty good about things again. I could list many other factors which would only make this over-long post even longer. And although “correlation does not imply causation,” the data is compelling, even considering the extremely small sample size of the test.

The Verdict

I highly recommend this product. Why? Well, those who know me well already know I highly recommend nearly every product I come across. Why? Because these things are tools, and there’s always going to be the right tool for the right job. You yourself may try these and not notice a change at all. You may try them and find they’re the miracle you’ve been searching for all your dieting life. And that’s my point: I don’t know. So as long as something isn’t outright dangerous, I’m always going to recommend you give it a shot if you’re still looking for the tool that suits you best.

After all, a guy wearing scrubs would never lead you wrong, would he? Oh, and if Sonic wants to send me some food to see if it helps me lose weight, I won’t say no to that either.