Return to Onederland

Long time readers of this blog—you three know who you are—are well aware that in spite of the many and varied topics discussed here, none stand out more than Return to Onederland.

• It was the very first post when I re-launched Back to the Fridge in its current format back in August 2008.
• It was big news when I stepped on the scale in 2009 and my weight began with a “1” again for the first time in five years.
• And it came up yet again last year, when even in the midst of chemotherapy treatments, I was still talking about weight loss.

Yes, in spite of all my creative endeavors in life—music, art, writing—I’m afraid I’ll just go down in history as the guy who wanted nothing more than to see the LED shapes between his big toes light up differently.

Oh well. At least it gives me something to blog about. And since it’s been a while, I might as well get right back on topic, n’est-ce pas?

Last Year

The big news last year only indirectly had something to do with cancer. It was February 2012 when I decided to give the diet thing just one more go around. By April 3, 2012 I’d lost nine and a half pounds in fifty-one days. Nothing spectacular, of course, but hey, at least it was something. Of course, April 3, 2012 is the day I went into the hospital and the worst thing imaginable happened: I couldn’t weigh in every day.

It wasn’t until Tuesday, April 17, 2012 that I got to step on the scale again. Much to my dismay, I’d actually gone up one and a half pounds: the scale said 222.0. I wrote this in my spreadsheet: “Considering I’m eating about 800 cal/day or less, I’m surprised this isn’t going anywhere.” I was apparently too drugged up at that time to remember this issue.

Though I wasn’t eating, I was getting heavily pumped with fluids. And as my innards weren’t exactly firing on all cylinders, the fluids were going nowhere. Until that very same day when everything seemed to start working again. As annoying as it was having to pee about once every forty minutes, I hopped on the scale on Wednesday, April 18, 2012 to see: 211.5.

I said to myself, “Huh. I went down half a pound.” I stepped off the scale.

Wait a minute.

I wasn’t 212 yesterday. I was 222 yesterday. I furrowed my brow. Something had to be wrong. You just don’t lose eleven pounds overnight. Was it some kind of fluke?

I hopped on the scale on Thursday, April 19, 2012 to see: 205.0.

Friday, April 20, 2012 greeted me with 201.5.

I couldn’t help but notice at this point that my balloon feet looked pretty much back to normal. And the official total? (Where “official” means “from the doctor’s visit at 3pm on Monday to the doctor’s visit at 3pm on Friday”):

26 pounds in four days.

Never before and (under the circumstances) I hope never again.

Onderland

It took six more days after that (not that I was actually trying) but one year ago today, on April 26, 2012 that I saw 199.0 again. I wrote, “THERE IT IS! I should have taken a picture. Maybe tomorrow, if this sticks and isn’t a trick.” Of course, two days later I was back at 201. But then again, I wasn’t supposed to be losing weight at this point, so I didn’t really care.

So how’d the 365 days since then go? Stay tuned. There’s lots more to write about. And I know the three of you are dying to know all about it.